Preparing to go 'under-the-knife' again tomorrow, and I am some what perplexed. I know this is a minor surgery- to remove the screws in my ankle (that were put there last year when I broke it)... but I am still nervous about it.
I hate the anesthetic. I don't like being aware, then suddenly unaware, then waking up nauseous.
It's the loss of time. I know when I have been asleep about how long I have been sleeping. Generally I know that I will be in the same place when I wake up (baring sleeping on a train). But in hospital, that control is all gone. I don't worry that I won't wake up, I worry that I won't understand when I do.
And then I worry about who will or won't be there.
But, my bags are packed. I have even stowed away chocolates into my bag. At least this time I know what is happening. Last time I didn't, it was just an ambulance taking me away, and I was stuck with only the clothes on my back, and the forethought of my mother to bring my phone and charger.
So there is one more sleep, then I am gone. By this time next week, I will be hobbling my way to Tonga............
